if i had a sugar daddy…

Oh, what a marvelous thing that would be!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m as independent as any other girl who grew up listening to Destiny’s Child and Beyonce and all that jazz. And I’m not very materialistic at all. I buy things that are about $4 and under on average and if I buy something full price or brand new, you best watch out for the apocalypse.

But sometimes it would be nice to think about all of the possibilities having a sugar daddy might present.

So don’t hate, appreciate!

Modcloth.com dresses

For some reason I have this odd belief that Zooey Deschanel must get her daily exercise by swimming in a sea of Modcloth.com dresses every morning. And exuding cuteness and charm like it ain’t no thang.

So first off I’d ask my sugar daddy to buy me some Modcloth.com dresses. And then suddenly Zooey Deschanel would suddenly swim from her sea of dresses to MY sea of dresses (that I’d be swimming in, duh) and we’d be best friends and exude charm and bask in our collective cuteness and it’d be history.

My favorites (since I stalk Modcloth all the live long day)


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-Puppies. Lots and lots of puppies.Preferably the monstrously large puppies.

Little known fact about me: I used to read dog breed books all the time when I was little. Obsessively. It was kind of a problem. And I used to volunteer at an animal shelter. Surprisingly, I never volunteered with a trench coat and left with my pockets barking. I honestly do not know how I worked there for so long without adopting one.

chicago 090

Oh yeah, that’s right. My fur-boyfriend would have gotten pissed off at me.

But really, I’d mos def ask my sugar daddy to get me loads of puppies so I could…

Put them in baskets full of clothes when they are sleeping. Observe their cuteness.

Narrate pictures that I will obsessively take of them.

“I’m sowwy. I fawted. Do you still ruv me?”

TheGreatPyreneesDog.jpg image by Auvergne_2008

Have them model for my hay-stack photo shoots. ‘Cause I can.

Put them into carts being pulled by plastic lawn donkeys. Once again, ‘cause I can.

And the classic thing to do with puppies…

Put them into baskets.

-Plane Tickets to either Buenos Aires, Prague, or Barcelona:

For some reason, those are my top 3 destinations I absolutely must visit before I keel over, probably because I’m a meatitarian (Buenos Aires), I’d like to live in a place where it looks like a Disney village (Prague), and I’m kind of obsessed with Gaudi (Barcelona)

Fun fact: Did you know that the makers of the Pokemon movies designed one of the buildings in their movies based on one of Gaudi’s?!?!

And if I had the choice of sugar daddies, I’d have to choose someone who knew how to play “Baby” by Justin Bieber on the recorder.

What, someone out there like that actually exists?!


What would YOU ask your sugar daddy for? Or are you your own sugar MAMA? What’d you buy yourself, sugar mamas?


7 thoughts on “if i had a sugar daddy…

  1. when i have enough money to buy more then sale shirts and food, i’ll get this stuff:

    a table saw, a little white pick up truck, a dog, a lot of tacos from mexico, a little house, a really nice blender

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