on who i am at the moment;

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at this moment in time…

….i’m much more content going to concerts solo. crocheting on a friday night and listening to songs like these. spend the evening prancing around beacon hill, arm in arm with a small group of friends.

i’m so, so, so hopeful. of everything. of the future book i dream about finishing. of the mountain-top home that will house me and my pack of dogs post-graduation. of this glittery city that i luckily call home. even so hopeful of the next book i want to read and the next pot of coffee i will make. the hope is getting scattered everywhere and i’m in no hurry to clean it up.

i’m so at peace when i find myself daydream about my thesis (i don’t graduate until 2013. i am gross). when i listen to my coffee grinder grind up my coffee for my french press. when i glance over my book to catch a look-see of the charles when my train car crosses over it.

i’m in disbelief that in a month i will get to go home for the first time in six months. i will get to see my platonic soul mate. and eat black bean burgers at my favorite deli. and eat tofu stir-fries at my favorite chinese restaurant. actually, all of my excitement is wrapped up in eating, so i will stop while i’m ahead.

i’m my own best company. i’m my own best friend. that is not to say i am some hermit, but what it really boils down to, i have this bubbling little cauldron of happy in me that i alone have made for myself. and that’s an important distinction, don’t you think?

i’m really loving the collection of baubles and moments i call my life. from squirrels crawling on my lap. to getting mauled with love by puppies in beacon hill. to my hilarious romantic misadventures (someday i will have to chronicle those. they are too ridiculous to not to be told). to being quidditch team mom. i’ve perched all of them on my dresser to gaze at them, in all their misshapen, yet endearing, loveliness.

 

{photos courtesy of the lovely maya munoz}

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8 thoughts on “on who i am at the moment;

  1. oh, lady grinning soul.
    first, don’t you dare clean it up.
    you’re taking the universe down to the healing with you.
    when i’m in boston later this month, let’s meet.
    my focus this season was on learning to be alone. fostering an understanding and love for self. to be, as you wrote, my own best company. not surprisingly, my focus wavers and my surety too. i crave your insights on this very topic…
    here’s to the brightest day.

  2. Oh gosh, I feel like such a comments slut.

    But. This makes me so happy for you, and it also really brightened up my own morning. I’m a big believer in being your own biggest supporter, lover, and inspiration. It’s so easy to lose sight of it though, and this is an uplifting reminder.

    P.S. Beautiful pics of you. I have major hair envy.

  3. I adore these photos that Maya took. You look absolutely beautiful and it’s because all of your inner-gorgeousness is shining through. I’m glad to hear you sound like you’re in a good place as well. So am I! But it seems as though we deal with similar things at similar times. Soak up your life’s goodness. If I got to spend as much time with you as you do, I’m sure I’d have even more to smile about too :).

  4. love your happy, spirited outlook. i agree on all your points, especially about enjoying and indulging in time alone–we are fabulous company to ourselves:)

    and i spent one glorious, sunny morning on beacon hill and it was splendid. what a gorgeous life you lead:)

  5. I no see the photos! Which is odd. Maybe it’s just me? Everyone else seems to be able to see them.
    Anyway! You are one big overflow of happy and cheerfulness in person, and I’m glad that you feel that way when you’re alone, too. As crazy and outgoing and social as we are, I think having that down time and knowing how to use it well is very important.

    #puppylove #youmakepuppiesintotraitors #youbeaconhillstrumpet #butyou’resocuteaboutit #thatitworks #goodtohearyou’removingupfrominstantcoffee #lolz #thoughiuseinstantoftentoo #soican’tbehatin’

  6. really liked this post.

    I was smiling big time throughout the whole thing, especially when I read the part: “I’m my own best company”. I love that and I love spending time along too. It’s so important in this busy, busy thing called life.

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