how to survive allston christmas;

allston christmas, the most wonderful time of the year.

that is, if your idea of wonderful is the sound of first-time haul truck drivers trying to drive down harvard ave, the sight of bed-bug infested couches being toted up mission hill, or every single 19 year old college and their extended family pillaging the local target of their shower caddies, swiffer sweepers and dorm fridges. so many of my friends from home and abroad were so confused as to why i kept complaining last week of how many ulcers september 1st was going to give me. so now you know.

there is a special day for us boston-residents, lovingly called “allston christmas”. essentially, all leases start on september 1st, and everyone tries to move everything they own on that fabled day of september 1st. what happens is people lose motivation, get tired, or don’t have enough space in their moving trucks, so they DUMP whatever they can’t fit/don’t want.  the sidewalks get covered in (usually) pretty bad ass pieces of furniture, and the whole city of boston does a sort of musical chairs of sorts with their cabinets and dining room tables for the next week. more appropriately, it should be called “allston hanukkah”, because the furniture sits listlessly on the curb for at least a week until the trash men come to pick it up. it’s the gift that keeps on giving.

{my entire cantabridian existence}
luckily i got to move my whole life out of cambridge and to brookline on the eve of allston christmas eve. no new rat-friends for me. i spent my allston christmas nabbing  old bookshelves and arranging my bed room to look like the corner of an anthropologie store. merry allston christmas to me, ya’ll. but not all of us got off this lucky this allston christmas. so here is a way to make your allston christmas the merriest it can be:

1. don’t move september 1st. just don’t do it. trust me. you will have a coronary somewhere between the back of a 66 bus and a rented zip car van. also, i’m pretty sure the rats are at their most excitable on this day, since they are all basically becoming homeless on the same day, so i’d watch what scurries over your feet. just stay inside. take a sick day. don’t go outside, it will be the biggest favor you can ever do for yourself.

2. don’t pick up anything upholstered, you WILL get bed bugs. as someone who had to go through the saga of bed-bug infestation from a friend’s borrowed suitcase (suitcase?!?) last year, just don’t do it. anything wooden is a pretty clear winner. i’ve already scored an amazing vintage wooden hutch for my dining room, a bookshelf, and an ice cream maker from a house a block away from me. that is what i like to call “making out like a bandit”, ya’ll.

3. tap into the magic of facebook. my world is becoming smaller and smaller as i get older. freakishly enough, i have a mutual friend with the now-former upstairs neighbors of my new apartment. i saw on a facebook invite last may that there would be a cinco de mayo  party at my future apartment (!?!?). keeping this in mind, i messaged my mutual friend to get the contact info for the girls who lived in the upstairs part of my apartment. weeks and months later, the girls were nice enough to 1. let me buy half their furniture for $150 bucks (and they moved it into my new place!) and 2. move all of my stuff into their basement days before allston christmas craziness. you see, facebook isn’t the devil all the time.

4. anna’s tacqueria, a local chain in boston. just do it. you won’t regret it. i’m thinking that from now on, the only way to feast on the day of allston christmas is to eat a super burrito from anna’s. when you’re all dust-covered from opening boxes sent lovingly from your mother, scrubbing the floor because you know four boys lived in your apartment before you, and have spent the whole day in the basement, anna’s will heal your soul and get you into the holiday spirit.

5. don’t overextend yourself. from august 26th-september 2nd, i’ve already helped four people move and i’m getting close to hernia-ville.  awkward bruises abound. trust me, you don’t want to spend fifteen minutes of your life trying to figure out just how you got those bruises on your inner thighs and the back of your right shoulder.

and now for the simplest rule of all…

6. just don’t move. ever. i’ve already told my roommates i’m probably not moving ever again. one, because my apartment is beyond adorable (i’ll have to do a tour of sorts, as it kills me with cutenesss; i have a breakfast nook, guys). two, because i don’t care for acquiring new rat/bug friends and i’d rather spend september first taking a yoga class or baking a cake. priorities and laziness, guys.

{thank you so much for your comments and love on the last post! i was initially scared to post it, but you all just solidified my love of the genuineness that i find in all of your blogs in this blogosphere.}

{and the winners of the giveaway were entries #5 for the orchid earrings (winner: renee richardson) and #13 for the heart bracelet (elisabeth) ! if you all could email me your mailing info, i can mail the prizes out to you! thank you so much for being patient.}


4 thoughts on “how to survive allston christmas;

  1. Hello,

    I won the orchid earring but I have been searching for your email and can’t find it. Thank you so much for the wonderful giveaway.
    Also, I had never heard of Allston Christmas. Sounds like absolute mayhem. LOL!!!

    fattybumpkins at yahoo dot com

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